The Gift of Tears

Most humans do not like pain and tears. Often, we categorize tears as bad or even evil and try hard to push tears away from our lives. Tears can be painful, but they are not always a negative thing. Have we ever recognized that our tears can be a gift? Understanding people who struggle to express sadness and tears can help us realize that tears are a gift.

Asperger’s Syndrome, now diagnosed as Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) Level 1, can occur in children. Those affected by this condition have difficulty understanding social cues and interacting with others; they exhibit repeat behaviors, and strictly follow rules and routines. It can be challenging for affected individuals to express their emotions, and they often struggle to shed tears when in pain. Despite feeling deep sadness, they may be unable to cry. Can you imagine experiencing intense pain and sadness without being able to cry?

Tears are integrated into the human system by the Divine Mechanic to help us process and release our sadness and to share our pain with others. Some of the very intimate and sacred moments of our lives are the ones that involve tears. Can we look at tears as a gift and allow them to become a means of connecting meaningfully with others? 

 

Belonging: Embracing Difference

The desire to belong is a fundamental need for humans. People want to belong to family, friends, and community. When rejected from any of these groups people can feel worthless and shattered. People who belong often have similar characteristics, interests, values, lifestyles, and cultures. Belongingness based only on similarities is not authentic. 

Authentic belongingness ought to have a heart that also accepts that which is different and unique in people. Individuals have shared characteristics of family, faith, and culture yet they are not exact copies. Individuals are unique and have the potential to offer something new to the world. Therefore, family, faith, and community need to create a culture that celebrates and embraces uniqueness.[1]

  Families and groups that are closed to individual uniqueness become stagnant and corrupt; they create an atmosphere of rejection, division, and hostility. True belongingness invites us as individuals and communities to love and promote that which is different and unique in others. For humans to flourish, true belongingness needs to have both lungs — similarity and uniqueness — healthy and functioning. 

Can we create space in our hearts and communities to welcome and embrace individuals along with their uniqueness?

 

 

 

 

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[1] Brown, B. (2017). Braving the Wilderness. Random House

Togetherness Generates Happiness

While you can be happy alone, most of your happy moments are born in the company of others, often with your dear ones. Recollect your previous happy moments and you are likely to discover that they happened in togetherness with other(s). The best predictor of whether you are happy or not is your social relationships. [1]

 Wealth, status, position, degree, reputation, and so on are not reliable indicators of happiness however much you may try to convince yourself otherwise. Family and social relationships are essential for happiness though you do not need countless friends and relationships. Most often you experience happiness in small groups of close friends or with family. [2] 

            Relationships that are rooted in the dignity of persons and conversations in which no one dominates but respects the equality of the other are fertile grounds for experiencing happiness. Such relationships create a warm, relaxed, friendly, and welcoming atmosphere. Relationships in which you can be truly yourself and feel wholly accepted are boundless treasures and sources of happiness and growth. 

Can you be intentional in connecting to people who make you feel valued and accepted? Can you create moments of togetherness that generate happiness?  

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[1] Wiking, M. (2017). The little book of hygge: Danish secrets to happy living. William Morrow Press.  

[2] Wiking, M. (2017). The little book of hygge: Danish secrets to happy living.