Some relationships fail, even when you have good intentions and a kind heart. Barbara De Angelis, an American relationship consultant and renowned author, provides two primary reasons for why this happens. While her insights are centered on romantic relationships, they can also be applied to friendships and other types of connections.
1. Right Person, Loving Wrong
You may be with the right person, but the way you love is unhelpful or even harmful. This can include poor communication, failure to express your needs, or allowing frustrations to build until they result in exhaustion and resentment. You might struggle with maintaining intimacy or neglect the relationship by not devoting enough time and energy to it.
2. Loving Right, Wrong Person
You may love in the right way, but you are with the wrong person. Your values, lifestyle, or long-term goals may not align. The person you are with might have harmful behaviors, such as substance abuse or being emotionally abusive, or may simply be unable to meet your emotional needs. These kinds of incompatibilities can prevent a fulfilling relationship from developing.
Relationships are essential for living a meaningful and happy life. It is important to not only discern the right person but also to love them in the right way. A healthy, enriching relationship requires avoiding both the wrong person and ineffective ways of loving, while ensuring that you nurture the right relationship with the right kind of love.
Notes
Angelis, B. D. (1992). Are you the one for me? Knowing who’s right & avoiding who’s wrong. Dell Publishing.
Interesting topic. Thank you.
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ReplyDeleteThank you
ReplyDeleteTrue!
ReplyDeleteYes, it's really in many a cases...I love with my heart someone but he/she hardly pats attention. I get frustrated not knowing that he/she is a wrong person in my life. Many a time we lack the courage to leave this person and move ahead in life. Thanks for your insightful reflection/article.
ReplyDeleteGood commentary
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