Challenge Your Negative Thoughts

My recent article, Tips for Building Self-esteem, reflected on the factor of ‘self-esteem’ and proposed the first tip that we go and talk to people rather than try to read their minds. This article reflects on what is a negative thought and how to overcome it, offering another tip to enhance self-esteem and overall wellbeing.

 

“Negative thought includes negative beliefs you might have about yourself, situations, or others” (Arlin Cunic). These faulty beliefs can affect your moods, actions, interpersonal relationships, success, and overall happiness. 

 

Some examples of automatic negative thoughts are “I’m stupid,” “I can’t do this,” “They’ll make fun of me,” or “They don’t like me because I’m not slim/smart enough”. Such negative thoughts create anxiety and fear and can affect one’s performance, success, and wellbeing. “The negative thoughts can be overwhelming and dominate how you think and act” (Cunic).

 

An effective way to overcome negative thoughts is to notice your negative thoughts and challenge them. MHA offers a familiar example from the life of adolescents: 

 

When you catch yourself thinking in extremes (e.g., “nobody likes me”, “I’ll never have any friends”), try to challenge your thoughts or find middle ground. Does nobody like you, or do you feel unwanted just by a few people at school? Will you never have friends, or are you just surrounded by the same people you’ve been with for years? Most of us are our own worst critics. 

 

Noticing our negative thoughts which are often marked by excessive use of words such as always, never, impossible, disaster, ruined, and perfect is a signal of thinking in extremes. Negative thinking magnifies minute errors and drives us away from reality robbing us of the happiness of life. 

 

Therefore we must challenge our negative thoughts and replace them with more realistic and balanced ones. 

 

 

 

Notes

1.     Mental Health America (MHA), (2022), 2022 Back-to-School Outreach Toolkit

2.     Arlin Cunic, 2021, Negative Thoughts: How to Stop Them