Heinz Kohut[1] (1913-1981), the founder of Self Psychology, envisioned “empathy as the essence of humanity…it means to be human is to be empathic”. Kohut viewed empathy as more than a psychological tool to collect data of the inner world of the suffering person. For him empathy was the core and height of being human and a means of bringing healing and cure to wounded individuals. According to Kohut a person who is not empathic is not really human. It is not uncommon to get hurt in life and to interact and live with people who are hurt. Empathy is important, rather crucial, not only in counseling settings but also in healing and nurturing our every relationship.
Empathy is the door to the inner world of the other person. One of my professors in the USA aptly described empathy as “Your heart beating in my chest”. Empathy enables one to understand the experiences of the other person as he or she undergoes them without any bias. Kohut defined empathy as ‘vicarious introspection’. Vicarious introspection is the process in which we enter into the inner world of the other person and understand his/her experiences, particularly the painful ones, as if having the heart of the one who suffers. Empathy is not only feeling the pain of the other but is also a compassionate and non-judgmental process to understand the layers lying underneath the suffering or destructive behavior of the other. Feeling the pain of the suffering person can bring solace and support to the suffering individual but if the process of deep healing has to take place then the accompanying person needs to develop vicarious introspection. Vicarious introspection is the ability to compassionately understand the roots of suffering of the other and pave the way for healing for the wounded person from deep within.
Empathic persons are wise. A caring understanding of the underlying roots of pain leads to wisdom that helps one to accompany the suffering person in ways that heal. Therefore, anyone who desires to bring healing to others and wants to repair, heal, and nurture his/her relationships needs to grow in empathy.
[1] Heinz Kohut in Grace for the Injured Self by Terry Cooper and Robert Randall, Pickwick Publications: Oregon, 2011
Empathy is essential for human beings and for all creation. God bless you.
ReplyDeleteVery good Reflection. Gives strength to be empathic
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